Friends like These
Laverne and Shirley
Phoebe, Rachel and Monica
Amy and Tina
Aibileen and Minny
Rose, Dorothy, Blanche and Sophia
These are the ride-or-die friends. The friends you do life with and the friends you can’t live without. I’ve often heard groups or pairs of women compare themselves to these pop culture friends. Or maybe they’re thinking, ‘if only I had friends like these.”
While it’s true that they are some of the strongest friendships on screen, what about the carry-and-live friends? Would they literally take you to the feet of Jesus?
Some men came, bringing to him a paralyzed man, carried by four of them. Since they could not get him to Jesus because of the crowd, they made an opening in the roof above Jesus by digging through it and then lowered the mat the man was lying on. When Jesus saw their faith, he said to the paralyzed man, “Son, your sins are forgiven.”
Mark 2:3-5
Now we don’t know if that man’s friends had to persuade him to go or if he begged his friends to bring him to Jesus, but what we do know is they did not give up. They carried him to the place where Jesus was preaching and healing. Upon seeing the crowd, they could have said, “Well, he looks busy today. Sorry friend; we tried.”
Instead, they hauled their friend up to the roof, dug through it and then somehow MacGyver-ed a way to lower him down so he landed at Jesus’ feet. It wasn’t even the paralyzed man’s faith that Jesus noticed. It was the faith of those four determined friends that caught Jesus’ attention and prompted him to forgive the man’s sins and heal him.
They’re not the only ones. Aaron and Hur held up Moses’ arms when he couldn’t. Jonathan and Nathan were David’s dear friends that saved his life and showed him his sins. Ruth and Naomi were inseparable. Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego chose to burn together. Elisha wouldn’t leave Elijah’s side. Jesus was surrounded with sibling pairs - Mary and Martha, James and John. Paul had Timothy and Silas.
These are the carry-and-live friends. These are the “I will walk into a fiery furnace with you” friends. These are the “I will sing with you in jail [sober]” friends. These are the “I will haul you and your mat to be healed by Jesus” friends.
Not everyone has those friends or had them, but life changed. Maybe you thought you had them until a crisis happened and then those gals were nowhere to be found? Maybe you were the first to have babies and endure sleep deprivation while your BFFs were still out partying? Maybe you have an empty nest and you haven’t quite got the hang of retirement life yet? Maybe you have lots of friends, but they’re not deep friendships?
Or are you the one who disappeared when your friend’s medical needs got too real for you? Did you drop the friend who can only seem to talk about diapers when you just got a manicure? Did you promise to help, but came up short? We’re sinners. It happens.
I know I have been on both sides. I’ve been the friend who showed up with food. I’ve been the friend to make and take the call that starts “I am really mad and hurt and I don’t need you to solve my problem, I just need you to be mad with me.” I’ve been the friend that took you out for drinks or cuddled your baby. I’ve also been the friend that had to say, “You’re wrong.” And I’ve been the one to say, “I was wrong.”
No matter what your situation is, you know who to look for thanks to these Biblical examples - in yourself and others. Also, you’re not alone. WE are not alone. We’ve got the best friend of all time and eternity: Jesus. He’s there in the crisis. He’s there ready to celebrate. He’s there for the everyday stuff. He’s also there when you drop the ball and can’t bring yourself to look in the mirror.
I might not have a Laverne to my Shirley or a Dorothy for my Rose. I’ve got something better. I’ve got someones better. I could name you, but you know who you are. Thank you for being my carry-and-live friends. And Jesus. Thank you for being the best when I’m not.